Wednesday, November 18, 2009

And the winner is.....

..for the award of most useless use of shop space in Portland goes to "Stout, Microbrew, Wine and Market." The new..ok..I'll call it a bottle shop..located at 2033 SE Hawthorne, opened with the fanfare of an ant's fart, and rightly so. Stout, Microbrew, Wine and Market (yes, that's the name) is to bottle shops what MC Donald's is to fine dining. Walking in reveals a selection only second to 7-11, after it's been robbed and hit by a bomb. 80% of the beers are from Pyramid, 10 from Misc, and the rest is PBR. 6 packs of macro brews, hanging out warm against the wall, will run you 7.99, while the special of the day, Pyramid 12 packs, will set you back 8.99. It might be the only place in town to still get spring seasonals. Nothing is really priced, and you need the shop owner, with his phone glued to his ear, to let you know what things cost. Though after being there, I learned it is either 7.99, or 8.99. The soda to beer ratio was roughly 3 to 1, and the back room was full with assorted crackers, ramen noodles, and other crap I saw for a split second before bolting out the door.
Ignore the British flag on the sign too, since I saw not a single brew from the UK.
Oh yeah, they have wine too. Save yourself the 200% markup and go to Plaid Pantry.
If you have the desire to stop and check it out, pull over, place your hand in your glove compartment, and slam it repeatedly until you pass out from the pain. You will thank me later.

6 comments:

  1. This is right around the corner from my house. I got all excited when I saw it go in, thinking, "wow, an even closer version of Beermongers".

    But, as you noted, the selection is ridiculous, chosen by someone with no knowledge of beer whatsoever. Odd.

    The 7-11 on the corner actually has a decent micro selection, including Ninkasi bombers, and Bigfoot 6-packs every winter.

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  2. Yeah, I was not expecting much, and not much is what I got. It's just a weird little store. I do not think the most awesome Beer Mongers has much to worry about.

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  3. Odd is right! The owner and "manager" of this place have been banned from the nearby 7-11 for their bizarre behavior. Hopefully they'll close soon because they're creeping out the neighborhood.

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  4. This pitiful place has gone out of business and they've done it in an especially pitiful way. It's proprietor, Joe Bridwell, attempted to sell the space it occupied (for $80,000), despite the fact the HE DIDN'T OWN IT! Thankfully, his fraud was broken up just before he got away with it.

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  5. Heads up that this crook Joe E. Bridwell is attempting to open another store, with the very similar name of "STOUT MICROBREW AND WINE MARKET", this time at 8136 SE FOSTER #140.

    STOUT MICROBREW AND WINE MARKET

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  6. I stopped @ the Foster store yesterday. I was stoked because I thought there was finally going to be a store in my 'hood with a decent selection of beer. The sign out front even reads,"99 Beers". Talk about deceptive advertising. The place has hardly any stock in it. The coolers were mostly empty, and the beer that they did have was mostly domestic crap. The most exotic thing in there was Modesto Modelo. No micro's in sight. The sweaty, greasy looking guy at the checkout assured me that the owner "was gonna be getting some more beers in here real soon". I wouldn't bank on it. Waste of space...

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